The Least I Can Do

The wife came home from work yesterday in a pretty good mood.  She had just came from the chiropractor’s office for her bi-weekly visit (that’s every 2 weeks, not twice a week) as her appointment was right after work.  She was a little more affectionate than normal towards me (not that she is normally not affectionate).  A extra touch on the shoulder here, an extra hug there, etc.  This usually only means one thing, namely she dealt with or spoke to a woman during the day whose husband did or said something wrong.

Over the years I have been the benefactor of other bad husband’s actions.  This is great for me as I don’t even have to to anything to appear above standard (husband-wise) but reap the benefits of this status anyway.  I have to endure the “story” of a husband’s or boyfriend’s actions and of course appear sympathetic but that is all that is required of me.  Other than that, I only need to maintain the normal husband behavior.

It is particularly good for me if one of the wife’s friends are the ones having the husband issues.  The updates on the behavior(s) are more frequent and thus I look all the better for it.  Over the years she has had several friends who have had husbands that do not live up to the husbandly standard.  The infractions could be husbandly or fatherly (not being a good father to their child / children).  Evidently I also meet the standard for fatherly duties so compared to these other, substandard fathers I compare favorably.  Again, as a father I just do what comes naturally, no more or no less.

I would like to tell you that I try very hard to be a good husband / father but honestly I really do the least of what is required of me with an occasional over the top performance (you know, to break the monotony).  My standards are based on some unknown list of requirements that I must have picked up from somewhere over the years.  I mean, there are the socially agreed upon minimum requirements of course: provide for the family, etc, but beyond that I don’t do much else.  But I do look pretty good compared to those who don’t even do the minimum.

In a few weeks I am scheduled to sing a special song in church service.  I chose a song that talks about what wives and children expect of their husband / father and the singer’s admitted short comings in those areas.  Ultimately he realizes he will need help from elsewhere (in this song, God) to know what to do.  It is a very emotional song for me so I hope I can get through it.  This song helps to remind me that I just cannot run on autopilot most of the time but really do need to realize that there are those that look up to me and depend on me daily to be the leader.  I hope I can remember that.

http://www.sanctusreal.com/ – you can hear the song and watch the video / story behind the song at the band’s website

Jon