Blog Number 174

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Tonight we ate by candlelight.  No, it was not a romantic dinner nor was it a special occasion.  The dinner was nachos and the kids were eating with us even.  A few days ago the 5 year old discovered a set of candlestick holders.  These were not just any candlestick holders, no these were actual wedding gifts that we have never got around to using (we have been married for 10 years now).  Now my daughter is a very practical person.  Everything has its purpose and MUST be used for its intended purpose.  So, when she discovered the holders, we HAD to buy some candles for them.  Fortunately we happened to be at our local Big Lots and snagged some for only $1.

When we got home she wanted to use them immediately.  We thought there was no harm in putting the candlesticks in the candlestick holders really (though we had no intention of lighting them).  This is when we discovered that the el cheapo candlesticks did no exactly fit in the holders.  Fortunately for us, candles are made of wax and we could carve and melt them into submission.  I decided to make that a project for the wife while I was at work today.  I came home to holders that were indeed holding candles but they were really black on the bottom and one of them was black in the middle and broken.  I thought it best NOT to ask the details (I guess the 5 year old had dropped one of the candles).

At any rate, tonight we ate nachos as a family by candlelight.  Of course a small fight broke out over who got to blow what candle out when we were done.  One small threat from me and the fight was over (I seem to recall saying something like, "Go ahead and fight over the candles, I guarantee this will be your LAST fight over them." - dads are always saying something like that).  I am sure though this will not be our last dinner by candlelight.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 173

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

I had 4 voicemails on my cell phone the other morning.  This is odd since only 2 people have my cell phone number.  I listened to them all on the way to work.  According to the screen, the calls came at 6:27 AM, 6:29 AM, 6:35 AM, and 7:03 AM.  I did not recognize the number.  The first 3 messages were relatively short and contained only some machinery sounds in the background and the occasional breathing sound.  I am not sure why you would listen to my voicemail recording and then not hang up if you were not going to leave a message.  I did not recognize the phone number (though by the are code, it had to be a local number to Kokomo, IN).  Then I listened to the last message.  It was just like the first except it lasted over a minute and a half.  It just seemed strange.  Just machinery and breathing and some talking in the background.

Fast forward to last night.  I did not have any voicemails but I did have 2 missed calls from the same number.  I decided it was time to take some action so I called the number.  As the phone rang I started to think about what I was going to say...

1) Hello, this is Jon, did you call this number 6 times and leave long, empty voice mail messages?
2) Hello, this is (insert cell phone number here), I think you have the wrong number.
3) Hello, stop calling me ya freak!  Didn't your mamma teach you phone manners when it comes to leaving messages?

I ended up getting some guy named Joe's voice mail.  He mentioned his business name in his recording but I have forgotten it.  I left him a message that was as combo of the 3 above choices (ok, it was a combo of the first 2).  I hope they leave me alone now.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 172

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well today it was our Sunday for performing parking lot duty.  Our ABF (Adult Bible Fellowship - fancy schmancy name for Sunday School) class is on a rotation with all the other ABFs to do various duties.  We already had a turn for help with the nursery / pre-school classes and now it was our turn to be out in the parking lot directing traffic.  I arrived 30 minutes early as instructed and was given a reflective vest and the following advise, "Try not to let the pedestrians get hit by traffic."  The guy in charge said this matter of factly as if it was not meant to be a joke.

Ideally it takes 5 men to run this operation but only 4 of us showed up so we had to make due.  I was given one of the lower traffic areas thankfully but I donned my vest and walked to my assigned crossing.  We had to be out there from 9:10 to 9:50, 10:40 to 11:20 and 12:05 - 12:25 as those are the times between classes / services.  My real concern was the 10:40 - 11:20 time as we would have people both coming and going to the church building.  All in all everything went really well (though it did get very congested when everyone was leaving around 12:15).  But once that push was over, we picked up the orange safety cones and returned our vests and just like that we are off the hook for a few more months.

I was hoping to get some live action shots for you but it just did not work out.  Suffice to say I carried an air of importance making various hand motions and stepping in front of traffic to let church-goers through the cross walk.  I will admit it was a little fun and I did get to say hello to tons of people I otherwise would not have seen inside the since my mandate was just to avoid anyone getting hit, I guess I accomplished this goal.

But now it is evening and the weekend is shot so I am going to sign off and try to enjoy what is left of it.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 171

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well it is Saturday so lately that means our mornings are spent on the soccer field.  Last week was brutal.  It was mid 40's and the wind was around 20 mph and constant.  Today the wind was lower and the temperature was higher so it was at least tolerable.  On top of that, we (finally) won a game (2 goals to 1).

The afternoon was nothing exciting.  We did lunch, played some Crash Bandicoot and pretty much vegg’ed out (though I did put in a few hours of work).  Then it was time to go fetch the mail.  This had the potential of being the highlight of my day but the only thing worth keep in my mailbox was a letter from the Texas Department of Transportation.  More specifically, this was involving a toll charge that I evidently did not pay on 03/15/07.  It seems I missed paying a toll on State Highway 121, namely a 40 cent toll.  Tack on a $1 invoice fee and my total invoice added up to $1.40.  I do not recall being on that road on that date (in fact I seldom take the toll roads for this reason) but the invoice states I was caught on video so who am I to argue?

Now, they had to print this document and mail it (probably 40 cent cost) and I have to write a check and mail it back and then they have to process my $1.40 check.  I think if you add it up, everyone would be better off if they just dropped the matter but I don't think that will happen (and I am not willing to try).  The bottom of the invoice says, "Thank you for using Texas Tollways!"  The even have the exclamation point as if they are real excited that I chose THAT road and not some other road on my way to wherever it was that I was going.  The invoice does say that I was on the FM 2881 / Old Denton Road area.  03/15/07 was a Thursday and according to Google Earth, HERE is where I was when this happened.  Friends, I am telling you, I was not there!

Well, I decided almost immediately that all I would do about it was mention it to you my faithful readers.  I dutifully wrote my check and have mailed off my payment.  I guess the next time that I am (nowhere near) there, I will be more careful.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 170

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well it's Christmas in April.  Actually, I am just now getting around to enjoying some Christmas gifts.  I finally finished the U2 by U2 book that my mother got me and now it is on to a book that my cousin got for me.  Also, I finally used my Blockbuster gift certificate to purchase a used copy of Crash Bandicoot for the GameCube.  And I finally got around to buying a DVD burner for my computer.  I have not gotten around to buying any blank DVDs but I guess that will have to wait a little longer.

When my DVD burner arrived from NewEgg, it was wrapped in bubble wrap.  I was by myself on the other side of the room from the family and as soon as I saw the bubble wrap I knew I had a decision to make.  Who is going to get to pop all these glorious bubbles?  I think every human enjoys popping these plastic bubbles.  I know for a fact that my wife and kids enjoy it a great deal.  So anyway, what to do with my treasure?

After several minutes of mental debate with myself, I ended up ripping the whole thing into thirds and gave a piece to my son (the daughter was busy in the bathtub).  His eyes lit up and in no time flat he dropped whatever it was that he was doing and set his mind to the job at hand.  Each piece was probably 1 square foot but there were probably over 100 bubbles.  He had them all popped in a matter of minutes.  I then handed a piece to my wife.  She tried (unsuccessfully) to hid her inner joy and attempted to play it cool.  She was not fooling anyone really and after a few minutes, all of hers were popped too.  When the daughter finally came into the room she was presented with her portion and she went hard at it as well.

The whole popping time only took about 10 minutes probably but I have this nagging fear that based on my lack of blank DVDs and my tendency to put things off, that watching the family pop the bubble wrap might be the most joy I get out of this DVD burner for quite some time.  Oh, if you want to pop some bubble wrap right now, try HERE.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 169

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

For the first time in my life, I waited until (almost) the last day to do my taxes.  Actually I had filed my federal taxes 2 months ago but I waited until the end to do my state taxes.  One of the numerous good things about living in Texas is that there is no state income tax however since I lived part of the year in Indiana, I still had to file my Indiana state taxes.  Since I was only a resident for part of the year I had to complete the following forms...

• IT-40PNR Form - Indiana Part-Year or Full-Year Nonresident Individual Income Tax Return
• IT-40PNR Schedule A - Schedule A for the IT-40PNR: Income, Proration & Adjustments
• CT-40PNR - County Tax Schedule for Part-Year and Full-Year Nonresident

In past years I simply purchased the state tax software along with the federal tax software however my usual program did not offer the partial year forms as part of their options so I had to do everything long hand.  It took me about 2 hours if you figure in the time it took me to find the forms online (via the Indiana Department of Revenue website), print them out, fill them out and mail them.  Notice the verbiage and naming concepts on the forms.  I am not a part year resident, I am a part year NON resident.  That sounds so negative.  Like I have the NERVE to live somewhere else besides that great state!

I thought the form would be pretty simple.  Count the number of days that I lived in Indiana (219) and divide by 365 and then pay that percentage of tax (219/365 = 0.60).  I turns out it is not quite that simple.  My simple method assumes too much (specifically that you earned your income consistently over the course of the year).  Well I completed IT-40PNR Schedule A (it had to be done first) and then IT-40PNR but had to stop half way to do CT-40PNR.  I had to start over once too due to a misunderstanding of the instructions.  After all was said and done, I had to sit down and write a check to the Indiana Department of Revenue for the grand total of $7.00.

But I had one last thing to do.  The instruction booklet for these forms (IT-40PNR Booklet) states as follows...

Staple your W-2s, 1099s, and/or WH-18s under line 1 on the front of Form IT-40PNR.

and

Do not staple your check or money order to the form as this will delay processing your return. Paperclip the payment to the bottom left-hand side of the front of the return.

I use a stapler exactly once per year and it is to attach my W-2.  I also use a paperclip once a year (actually I only need it the years I have to send in a payment).  Because of this I had to go to the front office of the apartment complex and ask to borrow their stapler and a paperclip.  Perhaps if the state of Indiana offered a tax credit for ownership of staplers and paperclips, I would invest in some.  For now though (since I am now a resident of Texas [a state with no income tax]) I will not be making those purchases.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 168

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well the wife is gone this weekend (PJ's, Polka Dots, and Promises Conference) so it is just me and the kids.  The kids and I have an agreement when "Mom" is gone.  We agree that there are really no rules (specifically no "Mommy Rules").  Actually we just say that "Daddy Rules" apply which is not really saying anything since the only rule is that there are no rules.  Anyway, we don't get too crazy.  It usually means that bedtime is extended (until they collapse on the couch and I carry them to bed).  It also means there is a little extra desert for everyone.

Some really bad storms came through the Dallas area last night so we were watching the news for details.  This limited what we could do as far as going out for dinner.  We ended up making a Burger King run (no pickles, ketchup or mustard please on those Cheeseburger Kid's meals) and got it To Go and came home and watched National Treasure (which we had seen before).  The daughter fell asleep on my lap around 8:20 but the son made it until the end of the movie (10:00 PM).  I spent the night on the couch (I like sleeping on the couch for some reason - which is upsetting to the wife since she cannot punish me by making me sleep on the couch).

Breakfast was a run to the Young Donut shop in East Allen.  They were very busy.  We really go there for their kolaches.  I had never seen these things in Indiana but they are everywhere here in Texas.  The kolachis here are basically a yeast roll with a tiny sausage and some cheese crammed inside but they are still good.  I don't like taking the kids out by myself (without my wife).  When I was living in Kokomo, there was a very high divorce rate (I think we were the divorce capital of the US for a short period of time - I seem to recall we had about a 70% divorce rate - with the national average being around 50%).  Anyway, growing up in Kokomo if you saw a man with children on the weekend you could bet it was just his weekend to have custody of the kids (you could also tell by the general unkempt look of the kids that dad was in charge of grooming that day).  For some reason I am still concerned how people look at me when I am out alone with the kids so I make extra sure they are wearing clothes that match and that the hair is combed well.  I just want to shout, "I am married, I am just getting kolaches while my wife is at a conference!"

Due to the rain we did not have a soccer game this morning.  It was scheduled at 10 AM but we might still have one (it is rescheduled for 1 PM but I am waiting on a phone call to confirm).  I am offering up prayers for a NO vote on the game.  It is still cold, wet and windy but we have had to cancel a lot of games already so the soccer people want to get games in real bad.

The wife will be home around 4 PM so I only have a few more hours of single parenting.  This is just enough time for the kids and I to practice our story of how healthy we ate and how we went to bed at a normal time (I am going to push for credit for making our bed too even though I did not even sleep in it - shhh don't tell).

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 167

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well today was the first day that I had to be at work while the "in-laws" were here so I have nothing really exciting to report.  However, I did want to share some pictures that my sister-in-law took while she, my wife, my mother-in-law, the son, and the daughter were at Fossil Rim.  You can click the link to their website but I would recommend that if you ever make it to this part of Texas that you save a day for going to Fossil Rim.  You basically buy 1 bag of animal food and then drive very slowly through their massive complex while stopping to feed the wildlife.  As you can see from the pictures, they get VERY close...

Anyway, that will have to do for a blog today.  The kids are home now after a long day and I need a few minutes of their time before the collapse from their busy day.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 166

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Since today is the first Saturday of the month that means that the apartment complex throws a breakfast get together.  They actually do this on the first and third Saturday of each month.  I mentioned this in a old blog as I recall (the fruit that looked and felt like fruit but did not taste like fruit).  Anyway, the son and I headed down there around 10 AM (when it starts) and partook of the free food.  This is supposed to be a social thing and people are supposed to talk to each other and get to know each other.  This does not happen really.  People come in, get some food and leave.  They also (and this kills me) take some of the pre-packaged stuff and put it in their purses, bags, etc., for eating later. 

Then there is Mr. Lonely, Slightly-Effeminate Dude.  There is this guy who is always there before I get there and always stays until after I leave.  He does not sit down on a chair or couch but rather stands in the kitchen area and hovers around the coffee maker.  He is about 5' 6" and a little soft in the middle.  He is probably 50ish and is usually wearing sun glasses.  He reminds me of the "making copies" character from Rob Schneider on Saturday Night Live.  He just hangs around the coffee machine and engages everyone in conversation.  For instance...

Random Person Just Wanting Coffee: (does not say anything or even make eye contact)
Mr. Lonely, Slightly-Effeminate Dude: Getting some coffee?
Random Person: Yes (no eye contact)
Mr. Lonely, Slightly-Effeminate Dude: You know they had good coffee when I was in Algeria.
Random Person: Ah. (quick glance, almost fearful, toward him)
Mr. Lonely, Slightly-Effeminate Dude: Yeah, I was there in 1972 for about 8 months.
Random Person: That's nice (prayers offered to the coffee machine gods for a quicker brewing period)
Mr. Lonely, Slightly-Effeminate Dude: I had a roomate that burned down my apartment.
Random Person: (now that coffee is done brewing, makes mad escape to the safety of the crowd on the other side of the room avoiding coffee)

I am not making his part of the conversation up!  These are all things that he actually said this morning!  His voice is very soft and slightly effeminate.  He seriously reminds me of every serial killer they have ever had on CSI!  I don't allow my kids to go up toward the kitchen area alone.  He just freaks me out.  My wife has some sympathy for him (not enough to actually want coffee so she has to go near him though).

Anyway, I got some unhealthy breakfast food today and got to watch Jimmy Neutron with the son (his favorite show) on the 40" flat panel TV they have in the building where the breakfast is held so it was not all bad.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 165

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

So my life has changed over the years of course.  My wife has been a big part of this.  She has become a "health nut" of sorts.  I say this with respect.  She does her homework.  However, here are two pictures that I took of things in my house today...

This pile of vitamins and supplements is my mother-in-law's

...and this was "growing" in my kitchen cabinet...

The bottom picture is my wife's attempt to "grow" some kefir.  She travels each Thursday morning at around 6:45 to buy raw milk from a local dairy farmer and this week she came home with a small jar of little white things floating around in a semi clear liquid.  I did not even ask (usually I don't have to ask, she is all to glad to explain [in great detail] all the tremendous health benefits that I will soon be enjoying from her latest research).  I have not read up on this kefir and I have thus far avoided the speech on how I won't be able to live without it.  I will have to let you know if it is interesting or you can read about it yourself.  From what I can tell though, what we got must have been a starter kit of sorts since she poured milk on the stuff and put it in our cabinet for processing.  Right now, the mother-in-law is eating (or maybe drinking) the results (on purpose).

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 164

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well the in-laws arrived this evening for a week long visit.  This means a few things to me...

• The apartment will will be very crowded for about 1 week (Chateau Dieterman is THE cheap vacation spot for all Indiana relatives)
• No more bath duty for about 1 week (the wife is very excited about this too, as is the daughter)
• Free babysitters all week (the wife is very excited about this and already has at least one date scheduled that I know of)
• Somebody has to sit on the floor (all we have is a couch that seat 3 comfortably)
• I will have plenty of things to blog about

Anyway, they made the 15 hour trip from Indiana today and arrived around 8 PM local time.  The son and wife were at chess club so it was only myself and the 5 year old that were here to great the weary travelers.  After I hauled up the luggage (all 19 steps) and the son arrived home, the mother-in-law and sister-in-law got right in on making up for lost time in the spoiling department (Easter baskets arrived early suffice to say).

It should be a good week.  The kids will get some much needed grandma and aunt time and the wife and I might escape the kids a night or two.  I will be sure to keep you up to date.  Until next time...

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 163

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

We have these giant "No Solicitation" signs on the entrance to the apartment complex and to my knowledge we have not been "solicited" in person in our 8 months that we have lived here.  However, from time to time, advertisements mysteriously appear on our apartment door.  I usually just throw them away without looking at them.  I mean these people are obviously not playing by the solicitation rules that all other businesses appear to be able to follow.  Today however I am picking it up a notch.

We got home from church this afternoon to find not one...not two...but three different flyers on our door.  One was stuck in the door crack, another was crammed into the door as well while a third was rolled up and connected to our handle with a rubber band.  This was a little much I thought.  So be ye forewarned...

Prima Pasta Ristorante Italiano & Pizzeria
Hong Kong Palace Chinese Restaurant
Mr. Gatti's

...that I am going to actively NOT frequent your restaurants.  I will also be recommending to all my local friends that they NOT visit your restaurants either.  For your ruthless invasion of my privacy and blatant disregard for the no solicitation rules of this fine apartment complex I hereby serve you warning that this is now war.  Unless you cease and desist all distribution of flyers and leaflets to my place of habitation I shall continue this campaign until you are out of business or until it no longer amuses me to do so.

Now, you may say, "Jon, this is a little rough".  To this I say, hogwash!  You see, those of you who would side with the above mentioned businesses would probably agree with the concept that "it never hurts to ask."  Well this is just not true.  Sometimes is DOES hurt to ask.  You see, they are basically saying to me, "Jon, we know that you don't want to see our flyers by living in a place that does not permit the passing out of our advertisements but we are just asking that you consider visiting our fine restaurants anyway."  Well, I am saying no and also I am saying that I will remember this little infringement on my privacy and carry my revenge to my grave!

Although, the hot wings at Hong Kong Palace do look pretty good...

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon