Blog Number 89

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well I was able to avoid death today.  Since it is Saturday and I do not shave on Saturdays, the wife could not attempt to end my life with Cruex (those of you who are confused will have to read yesterday's blog).  On the next several Saturdays, the son has soccer games and today was no different.  The mother-in-law and sister-in-law were able to attend as well.  This evening though the wife went out with them for dinner and a movie so I got bath duty.  Also, after the bath, we played 3 games of TriOnimoes (the 4 year old won each game).

This afternoon however, the rest of the clan went to a pumpkin patch and was was left all by my lonesome self.  I had no real desire to travel to the patch with the kids and they would have an equally good time with or without me so I took the opportunity to head to another Half Price Bookstore in hopes of finding more discounted CDs.  This store's selection was quite paltry compared to the first one that I visited so I was heading home a lot quicker than I originally intended to.  When I got back to the apartment I noticed a moving van backed up to my building.  I peeked inside and asked the 2 ladies who were in there if they needed any help.  The answer I was looking for should have gone something like this, "No, thanks.  We got it."  This however was NOT the response given.  All they said was a simple, "Yes."  So now I was stuck as there is no good way that I know of that you can withdraw your offer.

Fortunately for me, the van was about 75% emptied.  Also fortunate for me was the fact that she was moving into the a first floor apartment.  There were several boxes, a dresser, a mattress, a box springs and a few odds and ends so I jumped right in.  After a few introductions, I was helping her brother move the mattress and box springs.  He looked about like I imagined I looked after I had emptied my U-Haul a few months ago, tired and ready to be done.  But he was grateful for the help.  I remember when I pulled into the parking lot with my moving van.  All the other tenants kept their heads down and avoided direct eye contact.  I also remember how I felt when getting the cold shoulder and that is one of the reasons I volunteered my services.  That and the fact that the van was so empty (hey I can't help it I wasn't there when they arrived!).

Anyway, after everything was unloaded, I headed up to my apartment to fetch my toolbox so we could get the bed put together.  After that was done I said my goodbyes and let them know they were welcome to head up to my apartment if they needed anything.  Then I headed back upstairs and relaxed on the couch in front of the baseball playoffs.

All in all it was a pretty good Saturday.  I avoided death and got to help someone out, not a bad combination.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 88

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

This morning my wife tried to kill me.  Each weekday morning we have the same routine.  Around 5:30 she nudges me and indicates that it is time for me to get up and make the coffee.  The alarm is set for 5:35 but we rarely need it since the cat usually wakes us up before then.  After the coffee is made, we sit in front of the computer and watch a TV show that we have downloaded from the internet with our coffee.  Once that is over, I go into the bathroom to shave and shower and by the time I come out the kids are up and I grab some breakfast to go and kiss the family goodbye.

OK, now to the attempted murder portion of the blog.  I keep my shaving supplies below the bathroom sink in a basket.  Typically I will have taken my glasses off before reaching down there to grab my shaving gel and my razor.  Unbeknownst to me, the wife had Bogarted my shaving gel can to use in the shower.  With my glasses off I have about 20/100 vision with my left eye.  At that level of sight I can only make out shapes and colors so all I know is that I am looking for a orange-ish colored cylinder that is supposed to be shaving gel.  Since the gel was not there but in the shower, my poor eyes only saw the red-ish can of Cruex (hey, I had some issues a while back!).

Cruex contains Miconazole Nitrate.  I later read the fine print on the can (after I put my glasses back on) and it specifically says, "DO NOT USE in or near the mouth or eyes."  They go on to inform you that you need to call the poison hotline if ingested.

I was able to get to work OK despite this near death experience and I have since then forgiven my wife.  But if these blogs suddenly stop happening, you will know why.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 87

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

I received a few comments on the new layout.  They all were pretty similar.  They went a little like this...

"You changed something?  Hmm, sorry, didn't notice."

I will admit that the main reason for upgrading to the premium Xanga package was to get rid of the Google ads at the top of the page.  If you look at my sister-in-law's site, you will see what I mean.  Look at the top of the page and notice that there are ads.  Sometimes there is just one ad, other times there are as many as four.  Google has this thing called adsense where it looks at the content of the web page and then posts appropriate ads.  For instance, my first blog entry was about a cashier who shorted me $0.15 when I bought some coffee.  That day, the Google ads were for accounting software, coffee, and cash register supplies.  Makes perfect (ad)sense.  Herein is the main reason that I shelled out the $4 for the premium site.  You can just guess what kind of ads were there when I made THIS POST about naked mermaids riding bareback on stallions.  Nuff said (and you're welcome).

So the mother-in-law and sister-in-law are still here (day 2 of "no bath duty" – woo hoo).  As I arrived home everyone was heading out to the park.  This was fine for me since I had a little bit of a headache.  I ended up taking about a 2 hour nap on the couch.  As I was thinking about what to blog about tonight, I remembered a deep discussion a co-worker and I had about 6 years ago about naps.  This lady I used to work with would get very sleepy in the early afternoon and she thought that if our company would allow everyone to take a 1/2 hour nap each day, then everyone would be more productive.  I on the other had suggested that each employee be made to play chess for 1/2 hour each afternoon and that would make us better workers (due to increase in analytical thinking skills).  Also, napping at work would require a lot of space not to mention cots, pillows and maybe blankets whereas chess would only require a few chess sets (we could use the existing tables in the break room).  Well the company did not take either of our suggestions (shocking, eh?).

I still think it is a good idea (making everyone play chess) but as I get older, I see her point about naps.  Plus I know that if it were taken to the employees for a vote, chess would get about 1 vote.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 86

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well the mother-in-law and sister-in-law arrived this afternoon for a week long visit.  To my wife and I this means one thing, no more bath duty for us for a week!  We even gave each other a high five tonight in celebration.  The sister-in-law drew the short straw tonight.  The daughter has been in super happy mode ever since they arrived at the airport.  Evidently "out of town grandma/aunt visit" is some sort of crack for preschoolers.

We went out to eat at Bennigan's for dinner.  I stepped up to the greeter and notified that we needed a table for 6.  He asked how many kid's menus we would need.  Now it was apparent to me that there were 2 kids in the party.  I answered that I needed zero kid's menus.  He kind of paused like he was not sure how to proceed.  I assured him that no kid's menus were needed and he cautiously took us to our table.  Our waiter then came to our table and I ordered water for my wife, kids and I.  This always gets the "Oh, great" look from the server.  Ordering water evidently signifies to the waiter that we are cheapskates and this will undoubtedly be reflected in his tip.  Combine our water order with the fact that the kids had no kid's menus and this is like an alarm to the waiter.

Now, I am not a cheapskate (really) but the portion sizes that most restaurants serve nowadays just beg that sensible people share a plate.  Also, after an hour at a restaurant, all you really have is a full stomach no matter what you ordered.  The wife and I share a plate all the time when we go out.  We order a more expensive platter and share.  It is not our fault that we cannot consume enough food for 3 people each (some of the things on the menus could feed an army)!  Bennigan's has these new cheeseburgers that they serve on pita bread.  I ordered a BBQ Bacon for the wife and a Peppercorn Bleu variety for myself.  After they arrived, I cut them up and passed them out to the kids.  Everyone was full and as a bonus, Wednesday specials include any burger for $4.99 each.  So before tax and tip, we got out for $10.  The daughter decided she wanted what grandma was having so the son consumed a little more burger to make up for it.  I do reward waiters and waitresses with good tips for good service.  By not spending $2 each for drinks and $10 for kids meals, I have much more available to me to tip (assuming the service was good).

In the end, the mother-in-law paid for dinner.  If I had know that ahead of time I might have ordered the steak.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 85

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

In case you have not noticed, I change the layout of my blog site.  For $4 / month, you can remove the Google ads that used to be at the top of the page and you can also customize your layout.  I started playing around a little earlier today with the layout (something you can do without shelling out the $4) but when it came time to submitting the new design and going "live" with it Xanga then told me that I had to upgrade.  I thought it a little unfair that they let me play around (getting me hooked) and then forced me to upgrade.  But (as you can plainly see), their plan worked and my PayPal account is $4 lower (sigh).  Let me know what you think.

One thing we had to do when moving to Texas was switch banks.  Our bank in Indiana has branches only in Indiana (which is one heck of a commute to do your banking).  I signed up for the credit union that my company is associated with and planned on closing out the old account.  Ah but as you faithful readers know, nothing in my life is that simple.  For one thing, opening a checking account does NOT mean you get any checks.  When I asked, they said I could go online and order checks.  I went to the credit union's website and the only link referencing checks was RE-ordering checks.  I crossed my fingers and clicked anyway and sure enough, since I had no previous order, I could not re-order.  I really did not even want checks since they have an online bill pay feature that is free so I just planned on not ordering checks.

In order to close the Indiana bank account, I had to change all my auto-pay bills to reference my new Texas account.  That went pretty well except for my life insurance payment.  It seems that I had to fill out 2 pieces of paper AND supply a voided check.  Once again irony enters my life.  So I now have to order checks in order to be able to not pay with a check.  I ended up using Walmart Checks.  I got my box of 240 checks in the mail the other day and dutifully tore off check 1001, voided it, and mailed it to the insurance company.

Who knows when #1002 will be used.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 84

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

I recently finished re-reading "The Death of Ivan Ilyich" by Leo Tolstoy.  I read this in college about 18 years ago for a literature class.  I remember liking it very much and when I visited the local library recently, I checked it out.  The book is very depressing and looks at one man's death and focuses toward the end on his pain and suffering and his realization that he lived his life in mostly a wrong way (hey I said it was depressing).

I tend to read books just a few pages at each setting so it is not uncommon for me to take a month or two to finish a book.  This story is only 60 or so pages long so it took me only about 10 days overall.  I took it with me to work last week so I would have it to read at lunch.  As I was heading home for the night I stopped off at the restroom and laid the book on the sink while I headed toward the urinal.  Another man entered shortly after I did and noticed the book.  He then started a deep theological discussion while at the urinal next to me.

OK, the "deep theological discussion" only took less than a minute (how long can you take at a urinal really?).  The man had an accent that I could not quite place (somewhere in Europe perhaps).  Anyway, he was shocked that someone was actually reading Tolstoy.  I don't know why he was shocked exactly.  Was is because no one reads Tolstoy or that an American was reading Tolstoy?
A few jobs ago I worked in the laboratory at a foundry.  Toward the end of my tenure there, they hired a metallurgist who was originally from India.  He seemed a little proud overall and carried himself as if he was the most intelligent man there.  I don't think he did this on purpose, maybe I just wasn't used to his culture (or he to mine).  At any rate, one day he was trying to educate me by using a reference to another short story by Tolstoy.  The shock on his face as I told him the story verbatim was priceless.  Here was this $6.50 / hr lab dude that actually heard of Tolstoy (let alone had read anything by him).

This was the same look I got from the guy at the urinal.  It may be coincidental that the only two times I have seem this kind of reaction was from people that were not from this country originally.  Or it could be the fact that every time I bring up Leo Tolstoy to another American, they say, "Leo who?"

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon

Blog Number 83

Greetings and welcome to today's random thought.

Well I have missed my 2nd day blogging.  It is not my fault though.  My AT&T DSL was down from early yesterday morning until around 3 PM today.  When I called in to the help desk, the lady on the other end of the line seemed quite relieved that I was not upset.  Several times I would answer with a "That's OK" or "No Problem" and she thanked me with relief in her voice.  She must have had a bad day.  Odd that my simple words would relieve her stress even if it was a little bit.  So anyway, I have now missed 2 days blogging out of about 80 or so.

The other day I was thinking about naked mermaids riding bareback on white stallions.  Now, now, give me a minute here to explain,  Jeesh, you guys jump to the wrong conclusions so quickly!  Faithful reader, you should know by now that by the 3rd paragraph or so that I will make sense of it all.  You see, my daughter is a big fan of the Disney princesses.  She is also a fan of horses (as noted in a recent blog).  One of the princesses she has is Ariel from "The Little Mermaid."  She had de-clothed Ariel and mounted her on a white horse that my mother had recently purchased for her.  After she showed this to me, I had trouble explaining why I was laughing so hard.  She simply could not understand what I found so amusing.

I also mentioned in another recent blog that the wife and I were attended some Sunday night classes at our church about marriage enrichment.  One thing that popped up tonight was (from time to time) asking your spouse what he/she was thinking about.  My wife has learned long ago to avoid this question like the plague.  I only hope that none of my coworkers ask me this question tomorrow at work.

Thanks for reading my Random Thoughts.

Jon